The Reason Why
by IceMaize
Summary: Why he never talks about his family and avoids talking about it.
1. The Reason Why

Note : Hello! First of all, thank you to everyone, anyone who reads this. Erm this is my first fanfic so...it might suck... ENJOY and i hope you like it

Summary : Why he never talks about his family and avoids talking about it.

I DO NOT OWN KUROKO NO BASUKE EXCEPT FOR THIS STORY.

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The Reason Why

"**I'm home...**," he said, coming back from the convenience store, holding a bag with a basketball magazine in it.

As he passed his parents in the office he greeted them and left for his room.

For some reason, no one really noticed his presence except for his family, which made him think whether it was so hard to notice him by other people. Once he entered his room, he threw himself on the bed and rested his eyes. Before he even managed to fall asleep and throw everything on his mind away, he heard distant, but clear, shoutings.

"**You should worry...our child!**" A familiar, deep voice shouted.

"**Well...about you?!...child either!**" A high-pitched voice shouted back.

_Don't they know I can hear them clearly...when they're arguing this loud in the house..._

Though Kuroko pretends he never hears them and continues whatever he does, he can't help but feel guilty hearing his parents arguing everyday, every moment. He didn't and couldn't blame it on his parents. After all, he thinks it's his fault since it started after what happened a few years ago.

-FLASHBACK-

Kuroko was eight at that time. He laughed happily and loudly as he tried on his new bicycle he got from his parents. His parents were looking at him, smiling as they saw their son enjoying himself. The father left to continue his officework, leaving Kuroko and his mom alone. The mother smiled happily at Kuroko, he smiled back and continued cycling. After some time, Kuroko got bored of the bicycle and wanted to do something else.

"**Hmmm...Where should we go...**" the woman with light blue hair, reaching her waist, wondered.

"**Basketball court! Basketball court!**" The young boy said excitedly. He had seen his father playing with his friends very often as he followed his father everywhere when he was younger. He had observed and observed, growing an interest in basketball more and more.

The woman chuckled and said, "**I see, I see, let's go**," and gave a smile to her son. Her son rushed into the house, informing his father where they would go.

~~At basketball court~~

"**Mama amazing!**" Shouted the boy who stood by his mom which scored a shot.

She giggled softly and said,"**Thank you. Do you want to try, Tetsuya?**"

The young boy nodded excitedly as his mother walked nearer to him, passing him a ball.

"**Now hold the ball properly and don't let go Tetsuya**," she said while grinning as she carried him nearer to the hoop, which was shorter than an average hoop, suitable for young children. Kuroko nodded.

Since she was tall enough to reach the short hoop, she had Kuroko dunk the ball in.

"**YAYYYY!**" They both cheered as the ball went in.

Suddenly, a ringtone was heard loud and clear, she took out her phone from her pocket.

Grinning, she said,"**Tetsuya, stay here and don't go anywhere okay? Mama's going to talk to my friend**," receiving a nod from Kuroko, she turned her back to Kuroko while talking to her friend.

As Kuroko looked at his mother's back, holding the ball with his hands, he tried to shoot like how his father did when playing. He placed his hands in place and threw it up to the hoop. As it was in the air, time seemed to slow down, and he felt like it took hours as he watched the ball 'flying'. As the ball went nearer to the hoop, everything went on too fast, as if time was fast forwarding itself, playing with Kuroko's innocent time. Before he even realized it, he felt a strong hit on his head and landed to the ground his back facing it, making a loud thud.

He felt his body being lifted up, he left his eyes closed, too tired to open them up to see who picked him up.

"**..TSUYA...TET...YA!**"

Just when he felt like he was going to be in a deep sleep, he tried hard to open his eyes, hearing a distant call for his name. He only opened it halfway, stealing a glance at his mother's face. Her wide blue eyes, full of concern and shock. He opened it another time, only to see tears flowing down uncontrollably. The boy stared at his mother with his half-opened eyes, looking as if he just woke up from a long sleep. Trying to get words out of himself, wondering what had made her cry, nothing came out. His concerned mother wiped her tears before staring at the young boy again, who seemed lost in thought.

_Mama...Please don't cry...Why are you crying?_

The boy used his strength to lift up his hand, using it to brush his mother's tear as it was going to roll down her pale cheek. As he opened his mouth, he managed to squeeze some words out of him

"**Please... don't.. cry..**"

Everything went black. But before it did, he saw his mother's face shocked at what her son had said.

"**Baka...**" Tears rolled down again and again.

-HOSPITAL-

The young boy opened up his eyes and found himself in a white room, stinking of a smell like medicines. He lifted up his hand to touch his head and found out that it was bandaged. Outside, his parents were talking, although it looked much more tenser than talking. Staring at his mother, he realized she was looking down to the floor, avoiding her husband's gaze.

"**Why didn't you take more care of him?! He could have died!**" His father said, controlling his voice so that it wouldn't sound too loud to disturb other patients.

Kuroko saw his mother in the same position as before, but saw water droplets drop. But somehow, when his mother looked up to the man in front of her to argue back, her tears had disappeared and she spotted her son staring at her.

She rushed into the room, ignoring the man which was left outside, shocked by the sudden action of his wife.

"**Tetsuya!**" She hugged him tightly.

Kuroko felt his back going wet as his mother hugged him and realized what she was doing. Although he was uncomfortable in that position, he hugged her back and patted her back softly as if saying, _don't worry, it's okay._

Although she kept hugging him, she realized that her understanding son understood her as he read a lot of books.

_It must be because of reading too much drama books right, Tetsuya?_

She smiled a little before breaking from the hug to look at Kuroko face to face. Her tears still flowing uncontrollably, she mouthed...

_Thank you_

-PRESENT-

Kuroko knew. He knew. He was the start of the argument. Everything. After that incident, Kuroko's parents never interacted the way they actually did before the incident. Calm, loving and understanding. Now they were different. They started arguing about almost everything. If it was just a minor argument, one of them would back down. But if it was something major, it could go on for days until they drop it. Some topics were even repeated.

_Don't they ever get tired of it?_

Kuroko felt a tear coming out and stuffed his face on his pillow before allowing his tears to come out even more. He wanted it to change. He wanted it to be everything it used to be. But he knew it wouldn't be that simple, after all he faced the harsh truth after what happened at Teiko. He was now with Seirin, his new team he focused on bringing to the top.

_Just this once... if I had a chance to change something... I want to change my family..._

"_**Nothing will change unless you do something**__," _his inner voice said.

Kuroko knew that. He wanted to tell them, say he was sorry but knew that that would do nothing. He didn't know what to do.

_Happy endings don't exist._

That was what he firmly believed since young.

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Author's note : How was it? I'm very sorry if it didn't lift up to your expectations. Erm I'm still thinking how to end it. So help me and review! :D If there are more and more endings, maybe I'll make multi-endings. Anyways, arigato gozimasu minna-san! Hoped you enjoyed it!


	2. Silent Whispers of Goodnight

Note : Hey! First of all, thank you so much to everyone who read, reviewed, favourite my fanfic and gave me some suggestions. I really appreciate it! Like really! I LOVE YOU ALL! And... I really hope this chapter lives up to your expectations, I'm sorry if it doesn't ! Please don't expect too much! I don't want to disappoint you! And lastly... please enjoy!

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Silent Whispers of Goodnight

"**Tetsuya, dinner's ready**," a soft voice called out to him as he felt a hand brushing through his messy light blue hair.

He opened his eyes tiredly, staring at his mother before nodding slowly. She gave a small smile and walked out of the room, leaving him alone. Kuroko waited a while before making his way to the dining room. He saw his parents patiently waiting for him, sitting opposite each other with food laid on the square table between them, as usual.

_Is it going to be the same...?_

As the words stayed in his head, he closed his eyes for a while, wanting to remove that thought from his mind. He didn't knew why that question came whenever they were all together. It came like a curse. It disturbed him and he couldn't shake it off only until he was alone. He knew it would be the same. The usual short conversation, the silent atmosphere around them and the look of their eyes.

Pain, guilt, uncertainty, exhaustion. Those were what he thought he saw when looking at those eyes. He knew and knew that he was going to or was supposed to get used to it but he didn't and he couldn't no matter how hard he tried. He knew there was a small light of hope inside him, wishing to go back to the past. Disappointed in himself for allowing himself to keep that hope, he sat down and started eating with his parents.

No words were said, nothing was done and all there was, were sounds of metal clashing with porcelain as they took their food. He couldn't bear watching the scene anymore. He closed his eyes, munching his food, thinking of a past that would never ever happen again.

-FLASHBACK-

"**Tetsuya! Dinner's ready! Come and eat before everything's gone!**" with those simple words his mother said, the seven-year-old boy rushed to the dining table and started eating quickly.

A deep voice full of concern but at the same time teasingly said, "**You shouldn't eat too fast, Tetsuya. You'll have tummy aches. Do you want to eat medicines that much?**"

The boy immediately slowed down his pace and began eating at an average speed.

A giggle could be heard coming from his mother before she said while smiling, "**Tetsuya, you're too adorable! Tell me what you learned in school today!**"

"**Mmn!**" The young boy swallowed his food before looking at his mother and replying her. "**Teacher told us a funny story today!**"

"**A funny story? What is it?**" The father looked at his son curiously.

"**It's about a king who lives in a castle!**" While saying that, his blue eyes shone like a single bright star on an empty dark sky. He continued the story, ending it with laughter which echoed in the house.

Tears were coming out of their eyes and the whole house was full of laughter as jokes were told. Kuroko thought to himself, _I want to stay like this with Mom and Dad together forever!_

-PRESENT-

Somehow it reminded him of his time spent with Teiko's basketball club regulars. Eating popsicles together and winning matches together. That haunting memory pained him even more than he thought it would.

_All of them changed, and I'm going to bring them back to love basketball again._

The words echoed in his mind and a thousand memories flashed in his mind, remembering that he had already changed a few of them already and gave out a small smile. Realizing that he was daydreaming, he shook his head lightly to throw his thoughts away before continuing dinner.

"**Tetsuya, how's school?**" His father asked, making up a conversation.

It sounded normal at first but it tended to become more awkward. Different topics were said every night. Small smiles he seen from his parents' face were getting rarer everyday, it made the boy felt like that smile was given out of pity, full of sadness matching their saddened, tired eyes.

"**It's okay... and quite fun**," the young boy answered back, failing to think of anything else to say to drag the conversation.

He saw his father nod before his mother looked at him thoughtfully and said, "**So I guess you're having fun with your new basketball team?**" While wearing a smile.

That question had two pair of eyes fixed on him from both sides. Although he knew she was trying to act as if nothing was wrong, it was all the same as the past it had been all these years, smiling, talking cheerfully, he gave a slight nod, much to his own disappointment that he didn't give a better answer.

"**I see**," a small, satisfied, relieved smile formed on both his parents' face before disappearing almost immediately.

_Is it that hard to keep that smile on your face? _

He closed his eyes tightly before he was going to blame them. He was going to blame his parents and he scolded himself for thinking like that. He started blaming himself. Dinner continued without a single disturbance, without conversations and silence accompanying them. Everyone was lost in their own thoughts and wore a grim expression. The silent aura came back, making the atmosphere even tenser than before.

Soon, they all finished their dinner and went to their respective rooms, leaving the mother behind washing the dishes alone.

~~Kuroko's room~~

Laying with his back to the bed, he imagined himself holding a ball with his hand as he positioned his hand in front of him, making other people think that he was looking at his fingers.

He closed his eyes.

Imagining. Breathing. Remembering.

Family's memories. Teiko's memories. Seirin's memories.

Everything came by one by one as if showing himself a slideshow of his life.

His birthdays. His parents' heart-warming smile.

How he met everyone in Teiko. Akashi telling the team to eat properly like a mother.

How the Seirin team got shocked by his 'sudden' appearance. How he told them that he was always there when he was actually late for practices.

Certain memories drew further. As if saying that those memories were to be buried inside, never to come out again.

He withdrew his hands and placed his arms over his eyes.

_Stop thinking about the past. Stop._

Failing to put his mind on something else, he took out a literature book and started reading it, putting his whole mind on it. Soon, he was fully concentrated on the book. Hours passed for what had seemed like minutes for Kuroko as he flipped his book from page to page carefully. He realized it had gotten late as he looked at his clock and remembered he had to wake up in the morning to take Tetsuya#2 on a walk. He placed his book onto a pile of other books before going to the toilet to brush his teeth.

When he entered his room, he spotted his obedient dog, sleeping silently on a pile of used clothes Kuroko had prepared. He had no money to buy a proper sleeping bed for his dog and continuously used his allowance on vanilla milkshakes which of course, he placed in first priority over any other item. He gave out a small smile before taking a shirt from the pile and placing it on his dog's body.

Kuroko looked outside his window, staring at the bright full moon. He drew his curtains and tucked himself in bed. He felt tired, tired to do anything else and tired of finding solutions.

_I don't care anymore._

When those simple words flashed by in his mind, he scolded himself, told himself that the feeling was only temporary and it will be gone soon.

He gave in to his exhaustion and closed his eyes.

The usual, quiet lonely night's air in the house was filled with everyone's similar pain, sadness, guilt and whispers.

Pain of being the one guilty.

Sadness of being unable to solve it.

Guilt of being the one who made the problem...and whispers.

Whispers silently telling each and every one of them goodnight and I love you but never reaching them.

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Author's note : Was it okay? Was it okay? I'm sorry if it wasn't! Anyways, look forward to next chapter and maybe, just maybe I won't be writing any time soon. I have exams soon. But if I'm too lazy to study I'll write. Please review! I'm open to suggestions! Thank you for reading :D


	3. The Angel's Beauty

Note : Sorry for the late update. Erm anyways, thank you so much to those who have read, reviewed and favourites as well as suggested stuffs. I really appreciate it! Oh erm, if any of you didn't re-read the first chapter, I made some minor changes that Kuroko's parents argue about major stuffs only. Oh and for those who are asking for more details, I actually planned it to be revealed at the near end, climax I guess? So please wait patiently and lastly, please ENJOY :D

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The Angel's Beauty

The ringing of an alarm filled the silent air in his room. He slowly opened his eyes and carried himself to the alarm clock on his table. Turning it off, silence filled the room again. He stared at his dark room, sunlight blocked by his dark blue curtains. Translucent figures running around in his room started appearing in his sight, as if being projected.

He looked sadly to what he was seeing.

A young boy with light blue hair alike his mother's running around in the room, brightened by the shining rays of sunlight.

"**Please, Tetsuya!**" The mother said while following her son around the house, sounding a bit desperate, trying to persuade her son.

"**No! Dentists are scary!**" The young boy answered, before running out of the room again followed by his mother.

The bright atmosphere immediately disappeared from the dark room. Like the flame of the candle was gone, blown by a strong wind. He gave out short sigh before leaving his room.

As he opened his door, he saw his mother walking to the kitchen.

She smiled, "**Should I make breakfast for you too?**"

Kuroko nodded and walked to the toilet to brush his teeth and fix his ridiculously messed-up hair. After a few minutes, which seemed like hours to Kuroko when he fixed his hair, he sat opposite his mother, eating breakfast together.

"**Are you going to take him for a walk later?**" She said while pointing to the dog which was eating simple dog food.

Kuroko gave a slight nod, still eating. It was silent for a moment when his mother spoke again.

"**Do you want to walk me to my shop? It's been forever since you've been there and I need your help**," she said, while smiling.

"**Sure, but are you sure it's okay to bring him in the shop?**" He answered after a while, averting his gaze to his dog.

"**It's** **alright, well, I don't really mind as long as he doesn't destroy anything**," his mother ended the conversation there, with a light and short laugh.

Kuroko finished his food and went for a quick shower while his mother prepared to leave the house and made sure the things she needed were not left behind.

They left once they were ready and reached the shop in a while. It was either the really short walk or either how they got lost in thoughts which made them lost track of time.

~~Kuroko's Mother's Flower Shop~~

They entered the dark room and Kuroko's mother made her way through the shop without even making a wrong step as if she could see the way around. He picked up his dog to prevent him from destroying anything and spotted his mother from the window where light was appearing. His mother had withdrew the thick curtains which allowed rays of light to pass through the windows, lighting up the plain, small office_. _She started placing her bag onto the table as she settled down to do a little office work.

She seemed to remember something before turning to look at Kuroko. She smiled while saying, "**Please and thank you, Tetsuya.**"

Kuroko nodded, signalling that he understood what his mother wanted him to do and proceeded to open the curtains.

It was something he always did when he followed his mother to her shop, which gave himself mixed emotions. Part of it was a happy and nostalgic feeling and the other was squeezing his fragile heart, making his legs feel weaker than before. He felt like he could break down any moment but stood firmly as he was determined not to give up. He looked out to the bright sunlight, no longer blocked by curtains.

He wasn't sure if it was the sadness he felt for not being able to experience the happiness of a truly happy family again. Although he somewhat had a similar feeling when he spent time with his friends in Teiko or in Seirin, all he felt was a very different vibe. He, too, wasn't sure whether it was the loneliness he felt when the only people who actually noticed him, paid attention to him and made him feel like a normal person, were shattering in front of his eyes, and he '_couldn't_' do anything.

Bonds were shattered. Happy memories were thrown away, left behind...

Being forgotten.

Memories of his eight-year-old self spending time in the shop his legs had set foot on was buried deep down under a pile of other memories. He felt like he had no intention of taking the trouble to dig it out.

As soon as he felt that feeling, he himself, felt shocked and disappointed in himself. He wanted to punch himself and wished he could. He hardened his grip while opening the curtains. Once he was done, the person sitting in the office spoke seeing that he was done.

"**Tetsuya, can you help me a bit?**" She said.

"**Sure**," it was what he simply replied while walking to the office with his dog in his hands. He placed his focus on his mother, making his way there.

"**Here's the list of people who ordered what type of flowers, how many, and how they want it wrapped**," she said while taking out a small notebook from a drawer before placing it on the table. She smiled at her son, "**And also their address, so please deliver it for me.**"

"**Do I have to finish delivering them all by today?**" They boy asked, wondering if he could finish delivering them all on the same day.

"**Yes you do, my dear,**" she looked to the boy and smiled, and she suddenly remembered something. "**Oh don't worry, I have a bicycle the delivery person would use all the time, you can use that.**"

The boy averted his gaze from his mother who was still smiling, and said in a slightly childish irritated voice, "**And why do I have to do it when you have a delivery person to do it?**"

The woman simply answered, "**He's taking a day off and I'm sure Tetsuya #2 would love to enjoy himself in the wind once in a while.**"

"**And I was wondering why you'd asked me to walk you here,**" he said, giving a small sigh but smiling slightly, he felt lightened. Like part of his guilt lifted and disappeared. His mother chuckled softly, lifted up her hand and pointed to one corner of the room.

"**There's the bicycle. Remember to get the details of the orders correct. Oh, the papers are in there and ribbons in the drawer,**" she pointed to the shelf behind her.

Kuroko, seeing that the door was closed, placed his dog on the floor and it ran around the room. He smiled at his playful dog and took a seat down to read the first order. He simply skipped the unnecessary details and immediately focused on the order details.

_6 Lilacs _

_Wrapped in light blue paper with translucent white paper as an outer layer, showing the flowers and half the stems._

_dark blue ribbon_

He walked out of the office, and found himself looking at a room filled with different flowers from every aspect. They were all different. He stared at the scene. At how beautifully the sunlight passed through the windows which shone so brilliantly on the flowers. There, in front of him, near the entrance of the shop, stood his mother, shining beautifully. In her hand, she held a single carnation of yellow. She was closing her eyes, the carnation brought near her nose allowing her smell it. It seemed like a dream, where everything was like a rainbow, perfectly placed.

"_**So beautiful...**_" the boy unintentionally said aloud.

_...Like the sweetness of an angel..._

Once he realized he had said something so embarrassing, the blue eyes of his widened a little as his pale-skinned hand, softly shaped into a fist was quickly moved in front of his mouth. His face was starting to blush a little and he averted his gaze away from his mother. He felt extremely relieved he didn't say what was on his mind next.

His mother stared at him for a moment. She was shocked, but snapped out of it almost immediately and laughed softly at what her son had said. She placed the carnation on top of a wooden box and next to it was a paper, which had a word written on it, '**DISPLAY**'

She said, smiling widely before exiting the shop, "**Thank you, Tetsuya.**"

She looked up to the bright sky and her son's words and embarrassed face were still lingering in her mind. A tear came out, she didn't knew why it did but quickly brushed it off. She was happy.

Kuroko, still in the same condition, quickly entered the office and shut the door to hide his face which was still slightly blushing. Once he calmed down, he looked to one corner of the office which stood a photo of their family. Placed next to it was a tall, thin and transparent container with flowers in it, filled with water. He stared at the yellow flowers placed in it.

_...Carnations..._

_...She still likes yellow carnations..._

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Author's note : Hey~ did you enjoy this chapter? If you did, prepare yourself for another chapter which will come soon. Thank you all for reading, reviewing and all. I love you all. And I really hope that you all are satisfied with this. THANK YOU SO MUCH!


	4. Fear

Note : Here it is! The fourth chapter! A very fast update it is. Anyways, thank you all for everything and I think this is the part where its the twist? I don't know how to call all this writing stuff. I think I added too much unnecessary stuff here. Anyways, enjoy this, everyone.

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Fear

Kuroko opened the door and went to the section where the lilacs were placed.

_6 lilacs, blue paper, translucent white paper..._

He took out six and entered the office again. Once he placed the lilacs on the table, he took a light blue paper from the top part of a shelf and a white translucent paper at the bottom section. He wrapped it carefully and finished it almost immediately. He opened the drawer and took out a dark blue ribbon. He finished doing it faster than he thought. He looked at the second order.

_10 Daisies_

_Yellow paper, orange paper as outer layer_

_White ribbon_

He looked at the time and proceeded with the third order, fourth order, fifth order, sixth order and so on. His expression didn't change as he entered and exited the office back and forth. What was on his mind now were the details of the orders and nothing else. Order after order, flowers, papers and ribbons.

He was reading his last order for the day, the twenty sixth, when he stopped and stared at the details of the order.

_6 Yellow Carnations_

_Wrapped in orange paper and white translucent paper as outer layer_

_White ribbon_

He walked to where the carnations were placed and looked at the wide selection of it. His eyes looked at every carnation. Pink, red, white, striped and lastly, yellow.

He reached out his hand to take six of the yellow carnations. A scene flashed through his mind the second he reached out his hand.

A boy was looking at his mother. She took one yellow flower from the many and brought it close-up to her son. The boy brought his head up to take a look at his mother. His mother just smiled and her son reached out his hand to hold the flower.

Kuroko felt his finger touch something and went back to reality. He proceeded to pick the carnations while counting.

_1...2...3...4...5..._

"**Last one,**" he said in a very soft voice.

He was going to take the last one until he heard a voice and pulled his hand away.

"**Do you know...?**" She said, smiling bitterly, reaching for the last carnation. "**The meaning of these yellow carnations?**"

Kuroko nodded at his mother and looked back to the other carnations.

-FLASHBACK-

"**Tetsuya, isn't this flower pretty?**" She asked after taking a yellow flower and bringing it close-up to her son.

He tilted his head a little to the side and asked curiously, "**What kind of flower is this? It looks like a ball!**"

"**It's a carnation. It's my favourite flower, in yellow that is**," she said while giggling a little.

"**If it's Mama's favourite flower then it's my favourite flower too!**" The six-year old boy exclaimed.

She gave a small laugh. "**Do you know, Tetsuya? Every flower has different meaning,**" she said while looking at all the flowers in her shop. "**Sadly, this flower means-"**

She stopped talking once she heard a ringing of a bell. Customers started entering one after another. She had her hands full with the wrappings and couldn't spend time with her son.

When she had a small amount of time to talk to him, she didn't and took out a book which was not too think and not too thin. She smiled to her son, who started reading it once he received the book. She knew her son was a smart boy and would understand the words in it unlike her husband who didn't really understand until he asked. She remembered the time when she first passed the book to her husband. At that time, Kuroko was still not with them and they were laughing. He returned it after a few days and it made her wonder whether he really remembered anything in it.

Although it was an old hand-written book, it was taken care of properly. Inside were pictures, names, details and meanings of every different flower. Kuroko read it one by one, enjoying himself as he had nothing to do before.

_**Periwinkle (Blue) – Friendship**_

_A blue flower with five petals. There is a star-shaped outline in the middle of it, though it looked more like a pentagon._

_**Hydrangea (White) – Thank You For Understanding**_

_**Hydrangea (Pink) – Giver's gratefulness for the recipient's understanding**_

_**Hydrangea (Red) – Love and gratitude**_

_**Hydrangea (Purple) – Elegance**_

_A beautiful, ball-shaped flower. It looks like many small flowers were bundled together to make the big flower._

_**Dandelion (Yellow) – Faithfulness, Happiness**_

_The bright yellow flower looks perfect with the long thin petals sprouting out. Faithfulness and happiness was a suitable definition for the flower. _

_**Camellia (White) – You're adorable**_

_**Camellia (Red) – You're A Flame In My Heart**_

_The definition suits it. Multiple pure white petals around it made it looked a bit like a rose. People would have surely made a mistake for the two if the petals of the camellia aren't oddly shaped. They look sharp and like a star._

He continued on and on.

_**Rose (Single full bloom) – I love you, I still do**_

_**Rose (Bouquet of mature blooms) – Gratitude**_

_**Rose (Yellow) – Try to care more**_

_**Rose (Orange) – Enthusiasm, Desire**_

_**Rose (Dark Pink) – Thank You**_

_**Rose (Light Pink) – Admiration**_

_**Rose (White) – Charm, Secrecy, Silence**_

_**Daisy (White) – Innocence, I'll never tell (Secrecy)**_

_**Sunflower – adoration**_

_**Bluebell – Humility**_

**Clover – Good Luck**

They were so many of them and he was really enjoying himself. He never knew that flowers had different meanings and loved it. It reminded him of his mother who loved flowers so much. Then, he remembered, the yellow carnation.

He turned to every page of the book to find its meaning but it was futile. It wasn't in there and his curiosity grew.

_Why didn't she write about her favourite flower?_

He continued to read it and fell asleep. He was woken up by a soft voice, his mother's voice. They walked back home and he called out to his mother to catch her attention.

"**What does the yellow carnations mean?**"

"**Oh. I totally forgot to tell you!**" She replied while chuckling. It sounded so forced to Kuroko, he doesn't know why.

"**It actually has a sad meaning, even though the yellow of the carnation makes you think that it would be 'cheerfulness', unexpectedly it's the opposite.**"

She looked up to the sky. Before she could continue, they already reached home and it was forgotten. Kuroko never asked again.

He felt like his mother was in pain when he asked. When she looked up to the sky, he couldn't see her face but he knew he felt some kind of pain in his heart. It felt like something telling him not to ask anymore and he didn't. Somehow, the next day, the day after and so on, he was relieved by his mother's forgetfulness. He asked his teachers in school and he finally found out the meaning.

-PRESENT-

"**Disdain,**" Kuroko said with his emotionless face but a tiny bit of sadness could be heard from his voice.

"**And rejection,**" his mother continued.

"**Why do you like carnations?**" Kuroko said, breaking the short silence that fell.

"**I don't know. I just... I guess it's like 'love at first sight'?**" She chuckled.

"**I'm going back in the office and there's a customer outside." **He said while walking away.

He entered, closed the door and slid down to his feet. He moved his head down and both his fist-shaped hands leaning onto his forehead.

_Again. That face. Stop forcing yourself. You don't have to pretend to be happy and laugh when you're not. You don't have to. You really don't._

He looked at the clock. Not much time had passed, only an hour and a half. He quickly threw the thought away and continued doing the last order. He needed some air and wanted to finish this as soon as he could.

Once he was done, he looked next to him where the tons of bouquets were. He looked around the office for a bag and found a big sling bag. He used it to fill the bouquets and slid it around his shoulder. Before leaving the office with the bicycle and Tetsuya #2 who woke up after sleeping as he spent the whole time running around, he looked out the office and said aloud, "**I'm leaving.**"

He left immediately using the back door and was outside before hearing a distant shout.

She said, "**Have a safe trip!**"

Kuroko smiled a little but it immediately turned into a small frown. He wanted to ask. He wanted to show how he cared. He wanted to help.

"**Sorry,**" he whispered. "**I can't help.**"

He placed his dog on the basket and took out the notebook to send the flowers.

Deep inside he knew, he 'couldn't'.

_**Stop lying to yourself. You don't want to face it. You're too afraid. When are you going to face the truth? The longer you take, the more they suffer and everything will be gone.**_

His inner voice's words echoed throughout his mind. He wanted to fight it, say it was wrong, he couldn't and he couldn't. But he made no effort to do so, he knew his inner voice was right. After that argument on that day, he was too afraid. Too afraid to do anything anymore.

* * *

Author's Note : Everyone, I hope you enjoyed it. In the next chapter, something happens when Kuroko comes back from the errand. I look forward to your reviews and the next chapter will come soon I think. It's exam week... and if I don't do the story, I have to study. Which I totally don't want to so... maybe or maybe not it will come soon. THANK YOU


	5. The Representation of Flowers

Note : Exam's over! I can finally start writing again. Enjoy!

* * *

The Representation of Flowers

Kuroko cycled his way through the residential area in the neighbourhood. Thankfully, they weren't many people around which made it easier for Kuroko. He blushed a little when he remembered what he said to his mother and sighed.

_Why do I always act like a kid when I'm with them? In school, I could be straightforward about anything._

He quickly threw the thought away, remembering the moment of being slightly out-of-character whenever he was with his parents. It irritated him a little, but just a little and he paid no attention to it. He headed to the first order's address and so on. He finished delivering the orders in an hour and a half since all the orders were very near the shop.

Kuroko cycled back to the shop when he heard his name being called.

"**Kurokocchi!**"

He knew all too well of that voice. He stopped cycling and turned to the source of the voice. Kise was heading his way, running and getting ready to hug him.

"**Hello Kise-kun**," he answered, moving to the side to avoid the hug making Kise trip and hit his head on the wall.

"**Are you okay?**" Kuroko asked, his voice still sounding so emotionless.

Kise nodded as he placed his hand on his forehead which was red. Kuroko started walking, holding his bicycle next to him and Kise walked beside him.

"**What are you doing here, Kurokocchi?**" Kise asked.

"**Delivering flowers.**"

"**You got a part-time job during the holidays? Why didn't you tell me?!**" Kise cried.

"**I'm not doing a part-time job. I'm helping my mother with the deliveries, that's all,**" Kuroko said.

"**Oh...So your mom's a florist. That's kind of fitting,**" Kise said.

"**So, what were you doing, Kise-kun?**"

"**I was doing a photo shoot nearby and when I went out of the building I saw you!** **So I thought that I'd hang out with you!**"

"**I see.**"

A short silence came. Kuroko was thinking of his team back in Teiko and suddenly wondered what kind of flower suited each of them.

"**-kocchi? Hello? Are you listening? Kurokoooccchiiiii?**" Kise waved his hands in front of Kuroko to bring him back to earth.

"**Yes, Kise-kun?**" Kuroko asked, snapping out from his thoughts.

"**What were you thinking about?**" Kise asked, curious.

"**Just thinking what kind of flower would fit you all**," Kuroko answered.

"**Wow Kurokocchi! You know the meaning of flowers! Tell me!**" Kise shouted.

"**Tell you what?**"

"**What kind of flowers suit us, Kurokocchi~~" **Kise said, sounding slightly sad that Kuroko didn't understand what he meant.

"**For Akashi-kun, he would be a black orchid and-"** Kuroko was interrupted by Kise with a question.

"**What does a black orchid mean?**"

"**It means full of authority. For Momoi-san, I think the orchid would suit her,**" Kuroko said, wondering what flowers would suit the others.

"**What does an orchid means?**"

"**It means delicate beauty and wisdom.**" Kuroko explained.

"**Woah, this is so cool! How about Aominecchi? What kind of flower is he?**"Kise asked like a bullet train.

"**I think for you, Aomine-kun would be an iris. An iris means inspiration.**" Kuroko said.

"**Then what flower would Aominecchi would be in your view?**" Kise asked.

"**Hmmm...Maybe a heather? It means someone's growth from regular to spectacular.**"

_Not like he wasn't spectacular from the start._

"**Heh.. But Aominecchi was amazing from the beginning! And even more amazing now,**" Kise said, putting his hands on the back of his head while walking.

"**Maybe for Kise-kun, you would be a yellow chrysanthemum, I think."**

"**Really?! What does it means?**" Kise asked, excited.

"**It means a wonderful friend, Kise-kun."**

"**Kurokocchi~! You're the best~**" Kise said as he hugged Kuroko.

"**Then what about Muraskibaracchi?**" Kise asked, breaking the hug.

"**I think he'd suit an ivy which stands for faithfulness, to Akashi-kun, that is,**" Kuroko finished, wearing his emotionless face.

"**Haha…So true... How 'bout Midorimacchi?**"

"**Hmmm... Maybe a freesia? It means being able to stay calm in different circumstances… But I'm not really sure whether it suits him,**" Kuroko said, tilting his head to the side a little.

"**So Akashicchi is a black orchid, Aominecchi an iris, Midorimacchi a freesia, Murasikibaracchi an ivy and I'm a chrysanthemum…Hmmm… That leaves you left,**" Kise said with his index finger touching his chin. "**What kind of flower would suit you, Kurokocchi?**"

Kuroko stopped his tracks and stared at Kise. They both stared at each other and when Kise blinked, Kuroko blinked.

"**W-what? Is there something on my face?**" Kise aksed, slightly nervous from the stare.

Kuroko shook his head and Kise shot a confusing look before they started walking again.

"**So what- Ah! I forgot that I have another photo shoot!**" Kise grumbles and shouts before leaving, "**I'll see you soon Kurokocchi!**"

Kuroko waved back at Kise and started cycling again. After a while, he reached his mother's flower shop. He lifted up his hand to turn the doorknob but immediately stopped, an inch away from the doorknob. His eyes widened as he heard sobbing sounds, no doubt, from his mother.

_Is she crying?... Should I go in? Or..? _

Kuroko didn't know what to do. He felt like anyone who came near him could hear his heart beat with it throbbing so loudly. He felt useless, when he could deal other people's problems with no difficulty he always had troubles with his personal ones.

_If I go in, what do I say?... I shouldn't think about that now! I need to go in._

With his courage in him after a few seconds, he opened the door slowly and saw his mother's back facing him. She really was crying. Kuroko stood still for a few moments, which seemed like eternity before making his way to his mother nervously.

Once he got nearer, he tapped his mother's shoulder, "**Mom?**"

His mother flinched a little but immediately turned around and hugged her son tightly. She didn't say anything. Kuroko, unsure what to do, put his arms around her and used one hand to pat her back. A moment of silence feel for a while.

"**So-**" Kuroko's mom was interrupted by her son.

"**Don't. Don't say sorry. It's okay**," Kuroko said, earning a slight nod from his mother and feeling his t-shirt getting wet.

_Okay? How is this okay? She's crying and I don't know what to do. Should I ask whether she's okay? Of course she's not okay. She's crying. Should I ask her what happen? I should. _

Kuroko mustered up his courage before saying in a whisper, "**What happened?**"

Kuroko waited patiently for his mother's answer. After a while, she looked at him. Kuroko passed a tissue to her.

When her tears were wiped off, she said, "**Nothing, really. I mean, something not important.**"

His mother probably knew that Kuroko wasn't going to take that for an answer and hesitantly explained, "**Actually, I just received a phone call from my friend. We sort of got into an argument and...Well, she's angry.**"

Kuroko let out a silent sigh and said, "**It's going to be okay.**"

Somehow, Kuroko felt like a dagger had pierced his heart. He knew his mother was lying. In the corner of his eye, he saw his mother's phone. It was showing the received call list and the recent one was by 'Dad.'

_I'm sorry..._

He closed his eyes as he continued to hug his mother, wondering whether it was for his own comfort or his mother's. He felt like giving his mother a pink carnation, sure that his mother would understand that he would always be there for her.

* * *

Author's Note : I felt like this was kinda rushed. Im really disappointed in myself. Dammit I feel like punching myself already. It's Sunday and I have damn school tomorrow dammit. Jeez, I hate this. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed it and thank you for reading.

Pink carnation – 'I will always be here for you'


	6. Flower Of Happiness

Note : Thank you for the reviews ^^ For those who are confused of Aomine's flower, Aomine is someone Kise look up to so I guess an iris would fit him in that situation. And well, heather is from Kuroko's opinion. Anyways, in Kise's opinion = iris. In Kuroko's = heather. I'm not even sure whether I'm explaining it right. Er, anyways, if you guys don't get it, just ignore it and choose one flower. Done? Done. Enjoy!

* * *

Flower of Happiness

Kuroko slowly opened his eyes and placed his hands over it. He could hear his clock ticking and somehow felt wide awake. He wanted to go back to sleep but he couldn't when the memories of what had happened came flooding in.

_If I asked what really happened, would she tell me?... Maybe she won't... No. I shouldn't think about this anymore. _

_What's done is done. I can't change what's in the past. _

_Leave it alone. Ignore it. _

The more he tried to ignore it, more memories came. Shouts were echoing in his head. So many unwanted scenes were visible inside his head.

_Dammit!_

Kuroko stood up to his usual routine. No one was home except him.

_No one..? Probably working._

He brought his food to the living room and started watching TV. He finished it quickly and after he brought his plate to the kitchen, he heard someone sighing from the office. He looked in the office and saw his father massaging his forehead.

"**Good morning.**"

"**Morn- It's already afternoon.**"

"**Ah. Is it? Good afternoon,**" Kuroko tilted his head a little to the side.

Kuroko's father was wearing a small smile before saying, "**Can you help me a bit?**"

Kuroko gave a small nod and entered the office. He looked at his father's onyx eyes and dark blue hair. He wondered how he'd look like if he had gotten his looks from his father instead of his mother.

_Weird...?_

"**Here. This is the second floor of the house.**"

Kuroko's father started asking him guides on the interior design. Kuroko easily solved the problems his father had and felt rather proud but somewhat nostalgic.

"**Okay. I'm going to need your help again tomorrow. Make sure you're free, all of us are going.**"

Kuroko nodded and left the office. He entered his room and rested on his bed before sighing. It wasn't really rare that they all would go out together, but it wasn't really often either. Sometimes, it would end up as an awkward day and others ending up arguing, thinking that he didn't knew.

Truly, it pained him. He felt like going out together again was going to build more pain from all the arguments. Not wanting to think about it, he picked out a book from his shelf and started reading.

"**Arf! Arf!**"

"**What's wrong? You want to go for a walk?**" Kuroko asked, looking at the time and thinking how many hours had passed.

At the answer to the bark, Tetsuya #2 barked and wagged his tail excitedly. With his dog's response, he got up and left the house, telling his father that he was going for a walk and walked with his dog, a blue collar round the neck.

After minutes of walking, when he was surrounded by shops, he entered a small flower shop. He didn't know why but, he felt like buying a certain flower. Once he had the flower, he went up to the cashier and paid. Although he didn't want his single flower to be wrapped, the cashier insisted and Kuroko gave in, since it was free. In one hand, he held the leash for his dog. In another, a green plastic bag.

He made his way to the park, constantly being knocked and not given an apology. He sat on an empty bench and saw stalls being set up.

_It's near evening already... An event?_

Kuroko waited to see what was going on. Not so long after, stalls were ready and filled with stuffs. More and more people started crowding the area. He heard his stomach grumble softly and decided to eat a snack, of course, for his dog too.

Once they bought food, they settled down on a bench. Kuroko then observed the people around him, seeing as there was nothing to do. Minutes passed and as he finished his food, he heard a soft sob. He looked around him, and behind him was a little girl, hugging her knees and face hidden.

He went closer and asked, "**Hello. What's wrong?**"

The brown-haired girl flinched and looked up to Kuroko, tears still falling. "**I can't find mama.**"

"**I see... What's your name? My name is Kuroko Tetsuya,**" he gave a small smile.

"**Yukimura... Ami..**"

"**Hmmm... I'll help you find your mother, so stop crying, okay?**" Kuroko smiled and patted the girl's head, earning a nod from her, a sign that she'd stop crying. Now that they were both standing, he wondered whether Ami was a middle school junior because of her height.

"**How does your mother look like?**" Kuroko said, looking around the park.

"**My mother can't talk. She has long beautiful brown hair!**" Ami's eyes sparkled as she continued to describe her mother.

Kuroko smiled and listen attentively to Ami. She was talking like a bullet train, about her mother while playing with Tetsuya #2. Knowing that he wouldn't be able to find Ami's mother in the crowd easily, he stood up on the bench with Ami and looked at the crowd.

After a few moments, he spotted a woman, fitting Ami's description, looking around worriedly, at the side of the area, away from the crowd.

"**Ami, I think I found your mom. Hold on to my hand and don't let go, okay?**" Kuroko said and held hands with Ami so that she wouldn't get swept by the crowd.

Once they were within reach, Ami released Kuroko's hand and hugged her mother. Ami's mother hugged Ami back tightly. Kuroko smiled as a scene played through his mind.

When he was with his family, he chased a cat and ended up lost. Thankfully, he didn't wander off too far and his parents found him not long after. They were so worried that he was kidnapped. Now, remembering that time, made him want to laugh at his parents' worried face and his own behaviour for chasing a cat.

"**Thank you!**" Ami said, giving Kuroko a hug.

Her mom smiled at Kuroko before slightly bowing.

"**No problem,**" Kuroko smiled before remembering something. "**Here, have this.**"

Kuroko took out a wrapped flower from the green plastic bag.

"**So pretty! Thank you!** **But why are you giving me this?**" Ami said, curious.

He whispered, "**This flower is called a dandelion. It means happiness and I think your mom would love it. I don't need it so you can have it.**"

Ami looked at the flower and hugged Kuroko again. She ran to her mother and they started leaving after waving goodbye.

Kuroko smiled, and it lasted long. He didn't knew why but he felt so light, so free.

"**Arf! Arf!**"

"**I guess we should head home now.**"

Inches away from the doorknob to his home, he stopped.

"**What?!...you..."**

"**...spend time.."**

"**..working?!**"

He caught fragments of the argument. He felt so weak. He sat down with his back to the door. He looked around him and he couldn't hear anything else besides his parents behind him.

If he was home, maybe the argument would stop.

_They don't know that I know... So how?..._

He looked to his dog and brought him at a distance from the house.

"**Mind barking for me?**"

As soon as Tetsuya #2 barked a few times, the distant shouts stopped. After a few moments, Kuroko entered the home, wearing his emotionless face. He looked around the house and saw his father watching TV while his mother, in the kitchen.

"**I'm home.**"

* * *

Author's Note : Was it too random to put the park thingy here? I felt like it was. Dammit, I don't like this chapter. I felt like I was rushing it... Anyways, thanks for reading! Hope you will look forward to the next chapter!


	7. Eternal Slumber?

Note : Hey guys. Sorry for the late update. If you guys didn't check my profile, I was at a camp and on a trip... That's pretty much my excuse here. Um, I guess I'm starting to feel pretty lazy to do this story so the chapters might be rushed/suckish or maybe the story will not be as good anymore. In case you didn't know, Kuroko's dad works as an interior designer and used to ask help from Kuroko. The whole family would always go out to buy furniture for the dad. Something like that. Oh, I give up this chapter so it's really not that good in my opinion.

* * *

**Eternal Slumber?**

He lay on his bed with his back facing it. It was way past midnight and he could hear the sounds of the clock ticking. He needed plenty of rest. They had to buy more stuff the next day. He looked blankly to his ceiling, remembering what had happened earlier that day.

_~Tick - tock_

"_**Dad, where's Mom?**_**"**

"_**She said she'll be choosing the curtains so she'll probably be at the curtains section," **__he replied, looking for a suitable and cheap coffee table._

_~Tick - tock_

"_**Hi Mom. Need any help?"**_

"_**Yea, should the curtains in the living room be dark brown or white? Your father said it should be brown but I think that it should be white."**_

_Kuroko looked at the two choices and said, __**"I think dark brown isn't suitable and maybe white's too bright. Wouldn't beige be a suitable one?"**_

"_**You're right. Why didn't I think of that?"**_

_~Tick – tock_

"_**We should choose the black one for the living room."**_

"_**No we shouldn't. Brown's better!"**_

_Kuroko silently watched for a few moments, knowing very well they're keeping the voice and temper in check. Well, they are in public. Who wouldn't keep their voice controlled? _

"_**I think-" **__He stopped halfway to make sure he had the attention of his parents and continued, "-__**that white would be better. The curtain's beige so it would fit."**_

_~Tick- tock_

"_**What? This one is nicer no matter how you look at it."**_

"_**No it isn't. These small three-in-a-set is nicer!"**_

_Kuroko had to voice out his opinion when an argument occurred. He knew they'd accept his suggestion. He really had to wonder how they would manage this 'activity' without him. His father may even be jobless._

"_**The painting is for the dining room right? I guess this one is more suitable. Plus, the area to put the painting should be suitable for this size."**_

_Tick...tock...tick...tock..._

Kuroko opened his eyes and started listening closely to the ticking of the clock.

_Tick...tock...tick...tock... tick...tock..._

He started having trouble to blink; unable to lift his eyes.

_Tick...tock...tick...tock...tick...tock...tick...tock..._

Slowly, he succumbed to sleep.

* * *

Kuroko wore his casual clothes, a white T-shirt and jeans. It was afternoon and they were at a shop full of vases and antique-like furniture. He had nothing to do and looked over to his parents. Even the salesman who's wearing a look of worry and fear, didn't dare interrupt and do his job like he was supposed to.

_Poor guy. Is he new?... I should go there now._

"**This vase is the better choice."**

"**No. This vase is prettier.. and cheaper!"**

Kuroko wondered whether they were thinking of the client at all. They were choosing the items based on personal likings.

"**I think this would be nice. It would suit the furniture we bought, right?"**

Kuroko was standing next to a vase half his size, black with white stripes.

They were in a average room but all around them were different vases of different sizes and shapes. It was too cramped as a matter of fact. Makes you think that the person who arranged this was crazy or narrow minded. The shelves were also full of vases!

_The manager must be stupid for not thinking of the safety of the customers._

"**We'll get that please," **Kuroko's father turned to the salesman and said.

"**Y-Yessir!" **The salesman answered, still feeling afraid of Kuroko's father.

Kuroko let out a small sigh after his parents walked out the room.

Things were done. It's finished. Once they go to the house to place the vase, it'll be case closed. The end.

* * *

Kuroko prepared food for his dog, hoping that his dog would rest after eating. He entered his room and lay down. He rested a few moments. After a few minutes or so, he reluctantly pulled himself up to a sitting position and headed to his closet. He took out his usual night wear and went to take a shower.

Showering, he felt the warm water running down his body. He closed his eyes and looked up, allowing the water to make contact with his face like raindrops.

_Is it possible...to make it like the past again?...What should I... _

He scoffed at his thoughts. How could he not know what to do? If he could, he would punch himself knowing that he just didn't have the guts to do what he should. What he should have done a long time ago. He lightly banged his head on the wall. After a minute or two, he checked his hair for any shampoo residue. After making sure there was none, he took his towel and dried himself.

_I have to do something. I should. Later. When we eat dinner. I have to. _

"**I'll be in my room. When dinner's ready, call me,**" Kuroko said loud enough for his parents to hear him.

He didn't receive a response and walked towards his room. To his relief, the dog was sleeping peacefully in its usual spot. Laying down on his bed while waiting for dinner, his stomach gave a small grumble.

_Okay, don't think. Just do. _

Kuroko smiled a little. Somehow it reminded him of how Kagami 'scolded' him for picking a fight with some other high-schoolers who were bullying others and how he should have thought of the consequences first.

It was nostalgic; reminded him of his first match against the Generation of Miracles after their separation. The match against Kise.

"**Tetsuya! Dinner's ready!"**

Kuroko didn't respond but made sure that the sound of him closing the door was loud enough. He was going to end this. Going to confront this.

Kuroko headed towards the stairs for dinner. Unaware of the small puddle of water at the long stairs, he stepped on it and he slipped. He stretched out his hand to grab on to the railing but was too late and fell mercilessly.

**THUMP THUMP THUMP**

Then silence fell. A small pool of blood was slowly coming out of Kuroko's head. His parents watched in utter horror.

He didn't move. He just laid there, face facing the floor. More and more blood was coming out. After a moment, the father quickly stood up and lifted Kuroko to see his face and shouted to his wife, **"Call the ambulance! NOW!"**

"**Don't sleep Tetsuya. Stay awake. Can you hear me?"**

Kuroko was conscious and heard the voice repeating the same words in a worrying and pained tone. In a distant, he could hear another high-pitched voice which belonged to his mother.

He wanted to say that he was fine. Everything was okay. He couldn't. He couldn't find the energy to move, talk or even lift his eyes. He could hear the choked sobs of his parents. Now he could hear his mother repeating the same words.

"**Tetsuya! Wake up!"**

"**Don't sleep! Hang on!"**

He forced himself to open his mouth to just say that it was going to be fine. Just as he opened his mouth by a fraction, multiple thoughts were flooding in.

_Am I going to wake up?_

When he wanted to voice out, everything went black.


	8. Longing Warmth

Note : You know, I expected the climax to be here. In this chapter. But no it isn't. Guess I accidentally dragged it too long. Anyways, this isn't much but it's something. The climax shall be in the next chapter! ...I think. Yea it should be. Or maybe not. Maybe I'm gonna put some flashbacks first. *sigh.

Thank you for the review. I get the feeling of wanting a story you really, really like to have an ending. So, I will finish this! The ending's gonna be soon anyways so yea. Haha! Anyways, enjoy!

* * *

**Longing Warmth**

_Bright._

That was the first thing he thought when he opened his eyelids. He was lying on an unfamiliar bed, in an unfamiliar room with an unfamiliar person next to him. He looked to his side and saw the bright sunlight passing freely through the windows to him as his bed was placed nearest to the window. There was a hot cup of coffee on the table next to him, according to the aroma he smelled. He looked around the other way and immediately figured where he was.

_Hospital._

He observed the surroundings, remembering what had happened to him- when?

Questions started to fill his head. How long was he asleep? Were his parents fine? Okay, he felt stupid when the latter question came up, of course they were fine. They didn't fall off the stairs and had to stay in the hospital.

Coincidentally and fortunately, a nurse who was checking on Kuroko noticed that he woke up and immediately called for the doctor.

After a few moments of staring at the entrance, a doctor made his way in. Actually, he was walking pretty fast to the point where he was almost jogging. Then, followed by his parents and the flood of questions.

"**Oh my goodness, you're awake!"**

"**Thank God!"**

"**Do you feel better now?"**

"**Dizzy?"**

"**Are you hungry?"**

Kuroko just stared at them, not responding to their string of questions. Their questions were cut off by the doctor, who feigned a cough.

With that, Kuroko took the chance to reply and said to his parents, **"I'm fine.**"

"**Excuse me, Kuroko Tetsuya? Do you remember your name, age, where you are now and how you ended up here?"** The doctor asked politely.

Kuroko nodded and answered whatever questions the doctor threw at him. After a five minutes or so of asking questions and doing some nervous system checking, Kuroko complained about the sunlight that was too bright, which resulted in his father bringing in the blinds to cover it slightly.

"**It seems that his concussion isn't severe. He woke up after two full days and his brain is working well. He'll be able to leave after another two days. Also, since he should at least use his muscles if not he'll have trouble walking when he discharges so bringing him out for walks are okay," **the doctor explained to his parents but Kuroko listened as well. **"It seems that he has a few symptoms but he should be fine in a day, considering his situation. He only being sensitive towards the light, as you saw earlier."**

Kuroko stopped paying attention. He figured that was all he needed to know and he already knew what he wanted to know. His parents were physically and mentally fine and he was asleep for two full days. Now, he was tired and thirsty. Wanting to sink down in the bed from his sitting position, he forced himself not to and patiently waited for the doctor to finish so he could talk to his parents. He looked blankly outside the windows where patients and nurses were walking, some rushing some talking their time.

"**That's all. Remember. Rest and some light walking."**

"**Thank you so much doctor."**

He turned to face his parents when he heard the words said. He was immediately hugged by both his parents. Hearing muffled voices saying something like 'Thank God' and 'Thought I'd lost you'. Something along those lines. He was shocked but quickly recovered and closed his eyes. He wanted to absorb the warmth sensation he hasn't felt from them in years. It lasted a few seconds before they finally let go. Kuroko felt slightly disappointed but any emotions in his face was replaced by his usual emotionless face.

His mother said, **"Do you want something to drink?"**

Kuroko nodded. His throat felt so dry that even breathing was slightly hurting his throat. His mother passed him a 500ml bottle which Kuroko drank almost half of it in one go. After closing the cap, he put his hand over his mouth and yawned.

His father said, **"You must be sleepy. Get some rest."**

Kuroko nodded, lay down and let himself succumb to sleep.

_I'll talk to them about it later._

* * *

Kuroko opened his eyes and found himself looking at the window which revealed a scarlet sky. Assuming it was evening, he looked around him, in search of any familiar figures. Seeing as there were none, he sat up and got out of the bed slowly. He felt like falling the moment he stood. He grabbed onto the top part of the chair which thankfully, helped him stabilize himself. He spotted a letter on the table and read it. It was a letter from his parents.

_Tetsuya_

_There's a canteen on the 4th floor. This is the 6th floor. We left you some money in the drawer, use it to buy your dinner and make sure you rest after eating. We'll be coming a bit later, your father's client invited us for dinner and you know him. He can't say no to his clients. Sorry we can't get dinner for you!_

_Lots of love,_

_Mom & Dad_

Kuroko smiled a bit before opening the drawer and taking out the small pouch which contained money. He made his way towards the lift. It wasn't very busy and slightly quiet.

_Is it because it's evening?_

He ignored his surroundings and made the way to the lift.

* * *

There were a few people in the canteen. As he opened the door, the bell rang, signalling a new customer. The cashier smiled at him and waited for him as he made his way towards her.

"**What would you like to order?"**

Kuroko looked at the list of food for a few moments and then said, **"I'll have Set A."**

"**Set A coming up, anything else?"**

"**No, thank you."**

After collecting his food and paying the cashier, he sat down on a chair at a table for two. He looked outside the window. Nothing to enjoy was out there. Only cars, cars and more cars. He then looked to the sky.

_Beautiful._

It was truly beautiful for him. Maybe it was because it was an unusual red that time. Everytime he looked at evening skies, it would always show bright red but now, it was showing a scarlet painted sky. It was indeed beautiful. He smiled as two familiar faces flashed through his mind when he looked at the sky.

* * *

He stood at the entrance of his room with the door closed. He looked around, looking for something to do. The room gave him a feeling of emptiness. It was white, empty and deprived of life. He moved the chair near the window. He opened the window and settled down on the chair while staring at the now darkened sky. Soft breezes occasionally came and he enjoyed the cold wind.

After a minute or so of staying in the same position, he looked behind him. To the room deprived of life he was going to be stuck in for 2 more boring days. Somehow, he felt his heart ached like something had pierced through it. He looked at the door, with the hope of his parents opening it, coming in and filling his emptiness.

He felt alone. As he waited, in those few seconds, he felt the water pile up in his eyes. He ignored it and tears came out from the corners of the two eyes. He wiped it off immediately, thinking that if his parents came in that second, they'd be shocked and in pain. Which parent wouldn't feel the least bit sad when they see their child crying in front of them?

He felt weak. So very weak. He didn't even know why he was crying. He'd see them in an hour or two. It wasn't like they were gone forever.

He placed the chair back to its original spot and closed the window. He leaned on the pillow which he set upright so that he could lean back and relax.

'_We'll come a bit later'_

The words echoed in his mind as he visualized his mother saying those words to him. A scene replayed itself inside his mind. The moment he was hugged by his parents.

Again.

His heart ached for a second.

He missed that warmth sensation that his parents only had.


	9. Feelings Inside

Note : If you guys don't get this at all, I think you forgot to read chapter 8. I know some people DO read these notes and some people DON'T. And they only read it if they don't understand a single thing in the chapter. Straight to the point : **FLASHBACK. **From the beginning till the end, flashback. The next one should be coming soon. Maybe tomorrow. Maybe the day after. Just these few days. Be sure to check or you'll never know the ending of the story! So, it's way past midnight now... The time I completed this. I'm gonna go sleep, and probably wake up so damn early in the morning to find the blanket I'm using to be hogged by my cousin who's gonna be wrapped in a damn cocoon. So, goodnight and pray I sleep well. I hope you enjoy this...flashback. . . Although I didn't -_- except for the last part. Yes, the last. I like writing those stuffs, problem with that? Hah.

Damn. I feel like young Kuroko shouldn't be like this. It's too deep for me I guess. But, let's assume he's a smart kid alright? Well, he IS one. So, let's leave it like that. Remember, it's a flashback. This whole thing.

* * *

**Feelings Inside**

He opened his eyes and felt extremely tired.

Strange.

It wasn't the I'm-too-lazy-to-wake-up tired but the exhaustion of not being able to move a muscle. He tried to use his hands as leverage to position into a sitting position but failed miserably. The single push used up all his energy and he fell back to the bed almost immediately.

Now, he was panting slightly faster than before. He wasn't sure whether it was the drop that made him pant or the exhaustion. Then, he felt like there was a warmer under him. The heat was warming up his whole body. He immediately kicked the blanket off his body with all his power like how any other person would have done and shifted his body a bit, hoping the cold air from the air conditioner would help cool him.

"**I made hot chocolate for you," **his mom said, entering his room with a mug in her hands. The aroma of his favourite hot drink was filling the room. Naturally, the young boy loved it. He started feeling rather cold as he felt another breeze of cold air against his skin. Thankfully, his mother picked up the blanket and out it over him.

The boy averted his gaze from his mother and it lingered at the door for a few moments. He expected his father to come in, but to his disappointment, no one else entered. **"Mama, where's Papa?"**

"**He went to the pharmacy to buy some medicine for your fever. He'll be back in a moment."**

She removed the warm, wet folded cloth from Kuroko's forehead and kissed it. Smiling, she dipped the cloth in a basin of cold water and placed it on Kuroko's forehead again. Kuroko was having trouble keeping his eyes open. He wanted to wait for his father, but he couldn't stay awake. His mother just looked at him while smiling. Soon, he was already asleep.

* * *

"**...he feeling better now?" **A voice so familiar he didn't have to open his eyes to see who it belonged to.

Still, he opened his eyes and stared at his parents like he just woke up from a 2-day sleep.

"**Hey kiddo, feeling better now?" **His father said gently, using his big hands to stroke against Kuroko's hand continuously.

"**Papa..."** Kuroko mumbled with his eyes closed as he enjoyed the heart-warming feeling of being loved when his hair was stroke.

He opened his eyes and stared at his father when he stopped stroking his hair. His father just chuckled at Kuroko. It had always amused his parents that he would always stare at them, searching for family affection and attention more than usual when he's sick.

"**You have to take your medicine now," **his father said, receiving a pill and a mug of cooled hot chocolate from his wife.

He placed the pill in Kuroko's hand and supported him up by using his hands which resulted in the cloth on Kuroko's forehead falling off. His mother took the cloth and held it in her hands before it could wet the blanket. After placing the pill in his mouth, his father passed the mug to him and Kuroko swallowed it together with the pill. Then, his father gently placed him back to the bed.

His mother sat beside him on the bed as her husband left the room after giving Kuroko one last stroke on the head. She smiled at how flushed Kuroko's face was from the fever. She wondered whether she'd ever see him this flushed again in the future. Not from a fever but maybe because of a girl.

"**Get some rest, okay? We'll be back later," **she said.

Just as she stood up and was about to walk away, she was stopped in her tracks when she felt something holding on to her hand. She turned and saw Kuroko looking at her, his small fingers tugging on the index and middle fingers of her hand. He loosened his grip but still held onto the fingers. He locked his blue eyes on hers.

_Don't leave. I don't want to be alone._

"**Don't..leave..." **He finally said, feeling so selfish.

_I shouldn't._

He let go. His hand fell on the bed with a soft 'thud' and his mother walked towards him with an affectionate smile. She bent down and wrapped her arms around the young boy. He accepted the affection and moved his head next to his mother's so that they're heads were touching. He closed his eyes. After a long moment, she let go and looked at her son. The boy didn't open his eyes and she assumed that he was simply asleep. She then made her way out of the room quietly.

Hearing the door click a second time, signalling someone leaving, he kept his eyes closed in case his mother was still there. After a moment of silence, he finally opened his eyes and stared at his ceiling. He wasn't thinking of anything. Just...staring.

Until he realized.

He's alone.

No mama. No papa.

_I should sleep._

He shifted his sleeping position sideways and closed his eyes so that he could quickly fall asleep. He never liked being alone. Being in school helped him build the loneliness, for he was not always noticed. Thus, the only affection came from the place he called home.

Where his family was.

Where love was.

His eyes opened. The small glimmer of hope shone for a moment before disappearing. His mouth curved a little downwards. He closed his eyes slowly and shifted his sleeping position to the opposite direction. He could care less whether the cloth was on his forehead or not. He went into a fetal position. His limbs brought near his chest, head lowered with his fists clenched tightly.

He wanted it to go away. He knew it was temporary. He just needed to sleep and once he wakes up, they'll be there. And it will be gone.

_They will._

He assured himself and closed his eyes and he know that he'll be asleep in no time.

_Sleep._

But he couldn't help the feeling stirring inside him.

Fear.

Loneliness.

And... Silence.

It was eating him.

Inside out.

It seemed that the pill's were finally taking effect. The young boy was now asleep. With his face looking so peaceful. With his sleeping position looking like a baby's.

So calm. So peaceful.

No one will know.

The feelings inside a moment before.


	10. It's Over

Note : Damn. Took so long to write this. Leave a review and tell me how you think about it. I really really need to know about it for this chapter. Hey, I'm not sure whether there's another chapter coming up. But I think there's a big chance like 75 %? Damn. If I really am gonna write it, I hope it ain't hard. Oh, and I didn't re-read this chapter so maybe there's gonna be grammar mistakes or whatever. I shall re-read this again if I ever want to. Review please and enjoy.

* * *

**It's Over**

He turned his head towards the door when he heard it click.

_Mom?_

_Dad?_

To his disappointment, a stranger stood there and she stared at Kuroko. He returned the stare and she seemed to remember something.

"**Ah! I'm so sorry!" **She said, slightly bowing her head.

She left in a quick manner, without even bothering to listen to Kuroko's response.

When the door closed, Kuroko just averted his gaze to the window.

_Might as well just sleep._

He lay down and drapes an arm over his eyes.

* * *

"**Mama, where are we going?" **He said, tugging her hand to catch her attention.

"**We're going to take a family photo, Tetsuya. Didn't Papa tell you?" **

"**No, he didn't," **he said as he tilted his head to the side. **"Then where's Papa?"**

"**Papa's at work. He'll meet us at the studio," **she said, smiling at her son.

Kuroko didn't reply. He wasn't wearing his usual casual clothes but was now wearing a grey, long-sleeved, button-up shirt and long black pants. He felt uncomfortable but made no voice of complaint as he knew it was only a one-day thing. He only had to endure it for a while.

His mother was wearing a beautiful blue dress that matched perfectly with her blue hair and eyes.

Once they entered the studio, Kuroko sat down on an empty chair while his mother went to talk to the photographer. Soon after, his father entered the studio. He was his usual office wear but his hair was neater and somehow his clothes looked neater too.

"**Wow, my son's looking handsome today!" **He said as he hugged him.

Kuroko just smiled and hugged him back. They took tons of photos. Some individuals. Some in groups.

After the photos were printed, Kuroko kept his favourite in his room. It was in a beautiful silver frame with beautiful carvings on it. It was a photo of him between his parents and their faces so close together. But if asked where it was now, it would be found inside his drawer.

* * *

Kuroko woke up hearing mumbling noises. It was still night and the room was still empty but his parents were there, which made everything different.

He sat up, with the help of his parents. Silence. Now fully awake, he spoke.

"**Um..." ** He was going to say it.

_Don't think. Just say it._

"**I heard it."**

His parents looked at him curiously.

He continued.

"**I always hear you fight."**

He said in a fast manner.

He said it and he waited. He could feel his heart thumping so madly against his ribcage. He felt like his heart could jump out any moment. Still, he didn't look shock, sad... Anything. He was just there, waiting with his expressionless face. With his heart thumping so loud, the sound was as loud as hell in his head. He really wondered whether his parents could hear it.

He waited and waited. After what had seemed like minutes passed, no reply was given. He was determined to stop it. He was.

"**Why?"**

He lifted his head up a little to look at both of his parents. His parents was looking away from him. A glimpse of their eyes made him feel a pang of guilt pass through him. They were scared and guilty.

_Was it wrong? Was I wrong?_

Moments passed. There was only silence. He was losing his patience.

His heart was aching and with the unresponsive attitude, it wasn't helping.

He doesn't want this. He doesn't want them to feel sad.

_Don't look like that._

He loathed this. He wanted this to end.

And the time was now.

It MUST end.

He pressed further.

"**Answer me."**

No answer. He really was getting fed up with the silent treatment. He knew and knew.

It needed to end. He's already nearing the finish line.

He just needed to speak. It seemed as if it was the hardest thing to do at the moment.

Desperate for an answer. Angry for not receiving one.

_Just say it._

_Think later._

_Act first._

"**I knew. I heard it. I always have." **

His heart thumping harder and harder each beat and the beats resounding in his head, he lashed everything out.

"**Did you really think that I didn't know? Our home isn't made of sound-proof walls. Every single time you argue, I heard... Why?... Ever since I hit my head... Everything's just...broken...Why...?" **

His voice. Angry and desperate.

His face was now showing sadness and anger.

He waited.

No answer.

"**Why aren't you saying anything?...Is it that hard just to tell me why?...I know. It's my fault right? If it wasn't for me, none of this would happened."**

_If I hadn't been born, maybe- no, it would have been better. I should have just died._

His parents looked at him. They were shocked. It was their argument, but he was blaming it on himself.

His mother made the first move.

"**Tetsuya, it isn't your fault. It's just that we hadn't been on good terms, alright?" **She said, hands holding her son's.

"**Don't lie to me. Tell me the truth."**

He was scared. What was she going to say next? Truth really is a scary thing.

"**Tetsuya."**

His father walked towards him and he held his son's other hand.

"**It isn't your fault...It's just that..."**

"**Don't lie to me!"**

His parents looked in pain. Hell, this was painful for all of them. Kuroko pulled back his hands away from his parents'.

"**Listen, Tetsuya."**

His gaze was locked onto his father's. Truth to be told, he wanted as much as to just look away from him but held his gaze nevertheless.

"**It isn't your fault..."** He looked to his wife, **"Can you get me something to drink?"**

His father needed to talk to him alone.

She nodded, understanding the message and left. But she stayed outside, listening.

"**Tetsuya."**

"**..."**

"**Look, nothing's your fault. It's just that... after what happened that day, I was on the verge of losing my company. I was frustrated... And I basically let it out on your mother..."**

"**..."**

"**In the end, I still lost my company, but thanks to a friend of mine, I got a job and managed to hang on... But after that, our relationship got worse..."**

"**..."**

"**And...we got into arguments about almost everything... But it isn't your fault... It's our fault.. It's my fault..."**

"**Then...Then why don't you just fix it?"**

"**It's... it's hard, Tetsuya."**

Kuroko felt like he was asking the impossible. It made him wonder too. They were just fighting and fighting for no particular reason. How were they suppose to fix it?

"**Just...Please... There's no point in arguing."**

"**We'll fix it. We will. Don't worry."**

* * *

Kuroko watched as his father left the room. Apparently, he went to have a talk or something with his mother. Well, it was night. And it was quiet. So, of course, he heard fragments of the conversation.

Something along the lines like **"I'm sorry" **and something like **"I love you"**.

He stared for a moment and proceeded to lie down to sleep. It was over. He said it. Maybe in the morning, everything will be okay. Sure, maybe it will take some time and if it does, he'll wait patiently.

* * *

The next morning, he woke up with a grumbling stomach. He headed down to the canteen with the leftover money from yesterday. He entered the canteen, which had very few people in it. Then, his mind was brought over to a table next to a window, allowing sunshine to pass through it freely when he saw familiar figures sitting there.

His parents were talking. They looked happy with the occasional laugh from his father.

His mother noticed him and called out to him.

When he sat down with them, his father asked, **"Morning sleepyhead. Ready to go?"**

"**We brought a set of clothes for you."**

Kuroko then remembered, two days had passed, he could go home. **"Ohh.. Yea. Sure. I'll go change after eating some food."**

His father pushed his tray of food to him and said, **"Here, have mine. I'm not hungry."**

Kuroko nodded and started eating. Until, he noticed that his parents were staring at him, like they haven't seen him in years and wanted to absorb how he looked like and whatever he did inside their minds.

"**Can you...stop staring at me like that?" **Kuroko said as he averted his gaze from his parents'.

His father laughed and his mother answered, **"Don't be shy!"**

"**I'm not..." **Kuroko answered, his cheeks slightly red.

* * *

When he was changing, he heard a doctor talk to his parents. While changing, he listened as well to see if there was anything to know about his condition.

"**...leaving now?"**

"**Yes. Thank you so much for taking care of our son, doctor."**

"**No problem. I assume that his symptoms are gone?"**

"**He didn't seem like having any trouble this morning so I guess that it's gone."**

"**Okay. Thankfully, the hit on his head when he was eight didn't affect him or his condition now. If I recalled correctly, he was hit on the head by a basketball, correct?"**

"**Yes. After this, will Tetsuya have any problems?"**

"**Hopefully, no. It seems to be a light concussion since he woke up after a few days. Don't worry. Okay, have a safe trip back."**

"**Thank you so much, doctor."**

After a few moments, he pushed the curtains back to one side. He felt more comfortable now that he was in his usual clothes. T-shirt and jeans.

They left the hospital soon after.


	11. Love

Note : I was actually missing the guys from Seirin too. So, I guess this is the last chapter. Actually, I think that the ending is too rushed and this..too... Yes, it is short. And I'm sorry for that.

* * *

**Love**

After another day of practice, the basketball players of Seirin were on the way home.

"**Don't you think that Kuroko smile a lot more these days?" **Koganei asked.

"**Why do you always notice weird stuffs?" **Hyuuga said.

"**I'm serious! He even teases Kagami a lot these days! Right, Kiyoshi?"**

"**Hmm? Ah, that's true. Maybe something good happened to him."**

"**Does it even matter?" **Hyuuga said.

* * *

Kagami sat down at his usual spot in Maji Burger. When he looked at the opposite seat, he saw Kuroko sipping his vanilla milkshake. After all this time, he still couldn't get used to how Kuroko would always 'appear' and 'disappear'.

Naturally, he asked (shouted), **"Kuroko! When did you get here?!"**

"**I was here before you. You should really pay more attention to your surroundings, Kagami-kun."**

Kagami was speechless. After a moment of silence, he asked his companion, **"Kuroko. You've been smiling more these days."**

"**And you're unexpectedly trying to be observant today, Kagami-kun."**

"**Wha- No I wasn't!"**

* * *

"**I'm home."**

"**Tetsuya, welcome home. Dinner's almost ready so why don't you go take a shower first?" **His mother said while smiling.

Kuroko nodded and took a shower. After that, he ate dinner with his family. What accompanied them wasn't silence any more. It was happiness. They told each other stories and jokes. The house was filled with laughter and the occasional bark from Tetsuya #2. Something that wasn't there since a long time.

He loves his family.

* * *

Author's Note : This is the rushed end. I guess, for me. Anyways, it's actually been two months since I started this story, I want to say thank you to everyone who read, favourited, reviewed and supported this story. I am very sorry if the ending is not up to your expectations. Once again, thank you and I hope you enjoyed reading this story. Special thanks to hitomi65, my reviewer, who reveiwed almost immediately after I update a chapter. Short message, but it's good to know that somebody's there enjoying your work. Of course, this goes to other reviewers as well.


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